Vice Agent

And giving a whole new meaning to the phrase “pussy whipped….”

Former Project Runway contestant Kenley Collins was arrested this week after assaulting her fiance with their cat. Animal Cruelty! Quick, somebody call PETA!

According to New York City Police officials, Kenley is accused of tossing the feline, a laptop, a glass of water, and three apples at live-in lover Zak Penley during an argument in the couple’s Brooklyn apartment on Tuesday. Zak told authorities Kenley woke him by tossing the cat in his face.

Who needs a Doberman when you’ve got a tomcat?

He called the police and Kenley was arrested and charged with assault and criminal possession of a weapon.

“It was a miscommunication,” the aspiring designer told The New York Post on Thursday. “Fights happen, And that’s that. There is no case.”

In eight short years, conservatives have effectively bankrupted many state governments and left the fed in shambles. And now citizens have to "make tough decisions" and share the suffering equally across the land (unless of course, you're part of that lucky 1 percent who co-opted the functions of government to serve their own ends ... they'll be cozy with their offshore bank accounts, golden parachutes and permanent tax holidays).

    Barack Obama is now the fourth president facing the scientific and bureaucratic conundrum around the US-created ongoing wartime hazards producing disastrous health complications for soldiers and civilians.

Kanye West (31) has been charged with misdemeanor vandalism, battery, and grand theft stemming from a scuffle with paparazzi at Los Angeles International Airport on September 11, 2008.

West’s road manager, Don Crawley (33), has been charged with the same counts, but two of each.

If convicted of all charges, West could face up to two years and six months in jail, and Crawley could face up to five years in jail.

While waiting to catch a flight to Honolulu in September, West and Crawley wrestled a camera away from a photographer, and smashed it into the ground. Crawley then repeated that crime with a second photographer’s camera. Prosecutors said both photographers had minor injuries.

After the crime West blogged:

"I’m cool with the paparazzi. This guy wasn’t cool. I gotta work now … I’ll rant later!"

It’s not cool to break the law.

On November 14, 2008, West was arrested after another altercation with a photographer in Newcastle, England, and was released without being charged.

West will be criminally arraigned on April 14.

Kanye West’s giant ego finally got him into trouble. The sad part of this is the West may walk free, but Crawley will probably get jail time.

According to this week’s OK Magazine, Tom Cruise and his wife, Suri’s Mom (ok, Katie Holmes) are expecting their second child. Take this for what it is worth. If our beloved tabloids were ever right, these two have been pregnant non-stop since Katie popped with Suri almost three years ago.

Via OK:

“They are deliriously happy that Suri will be a big sister. They’ve always planned on expanding their family. They’re over the moon.”

Naturally, the story goes on to explain that Tom and Katie are keeping the pregnancy under wraps until she hits the coveted end of the first trimester. Supposedly, only close family and friends have been told.

The magazine continues to add fuel to the pregnancy rumors by stating:

“Many observers have already noticed some signals, in particular when the Cruises appeared at the March 11 Tokyo premiere of Tom’s movie ‘Valkyrie’. Katie looked stunning in a Jason Wu dress and billowing hair extensions.”

So wearing a Jason Wu dress or hair extensions indicates that you’re pregnant? This will come as a great shock to Michelle Obama and RuPaul.

Bobby Jindal gave the GOP response to Obama’s speech and what a disaster lil Bobby’s speech was! His awful delivery, Gomer Pyle wit and GOP world view made for a Bizarro-World counterpoint to Obama’s speech.

Amongst his canned anecdotes was a claim that “During Katrina, I visited Sheriff Harry Lee, a Democrat and a good friend of mine. When I walked into his makeshift office I’d never seen him so angry. He was yelling into the phone: ‘Well, I’m the Sheriff and if you don’t like it you can come and arrest me!’ I asked him: ‘Sheriff, what’s got you so mad?’ He told me that he had put out a call for volunteers to come with their boats to rescue people who were trapped on their rooftops by the floodwaters. The boats were all lined up ready to go - when some bureaucrat showed up and told them they couldn’t go out on the water unless they had proof of insurance and registration. I told him, ‘Sheriff, that’s ridiculous.’ And before I knew it, he was yelling into the phone: ‘Congressman Jindal is here, and he says you can come and arrest him too!’ Harry just told the boaters to ignore the bureaucrats and start rescuing people.”

Only problem? It wasn’t true. As in he wasn’t in Sherrif Lee’s office “during Katrina”.

Oh and FOXnews claims that Bobby couldn’t attend CPAC because he was busy with State Business (he was actually at Disneyland with his family).

If this is the best you have GOP, prepare for a long time in the wilderness. A long, long time. Hopefully forever.

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