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June 20th, 2009UncategorizedIn my interview with Cindy Hsu of WCBS – TV last week, I mentioned that I was pleased to learn about the imminent release of Elizabeth Edward’s book, Resilience because it will provide a seldom seem glimpse of the hurt, heartbreak, the humiliation a woman experiences in in learning about and trying to come to terms with her husband’s extramarital affair.
An Intimate Look at the Betrayed Wife Has to Say
All too often when we hear or read about cases of high profile infidelity, it’s all about the cheater -- who he is, why he did it, how he got caught, what it will mean to his career. The betrayed wife usually suffers in silence, rarely do we get to hear her story. Hopefully, Elizabeth Edwards’ memoir will change all that.
The book was to have been embargoed until its publication date, but the New York Daily News jumped the gun. Below are my comments on three controversial excerpts from Resilience that have been leaked to the public thus far.
Elizabeth Edwards Vomited When Her Husband Confessed His Affair
In recounting her reaction when John Edwards confessed his affair to her, Elizabeth said, "I cried and screamed, I went to the bathroom and threw up." Though it’s not often written or spoken about, it’s well-documented that infidelity victims experience physical reactions such as nausea, diarrhea, gastro-intestinal disturbances, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, headaches, loss of appetite, insomnia – just to name a few.
As a result of the trauma of infidelity, many betrayed spouses also experience PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) symptoms such as depression, anxiety, raging anger, intense shame, guilt, hyper-vigilance, flashbacks, nightmares, and more. Many marriage and family counselors are now using trauma-based therapies in treating victims of infidelity.
Elizabeth Edwards Does Not Mention Her Husband’s Mistress by Name
It has been widely reported that although Elizabeth Edwards talks about her husband’s mistress in the book, she does not actually mention his mistress by name. I’ve been researching infidelity for the past 15 years, and I can tell you that there’s nothing unusual about this. In fact, I applaud Elizabeth Edwards’ refusal to refer to her husband’s mistress by name.
Refusing to acknowledge the Other Woman by name is the recommended course of action for any woman who is trying to reconcile with her cheating mate. Once the affair has been brought out into the open and thoroughly discussed between the two parties involved, there is nothing to be gained by focusing on the Other Woman. To refer to her by name or bring her up name up in every conversation is to make her a part of their life and give her more importance than she deserves. The best approach in trying to repair a marriage, is to ignore the mistress, and carry on as if she doesn’t exist.
John Edwards Did Not Tell Elizabeth the Whole Truth About His Affair
Even when Edwards confessed to his wife, he lied about the affair, claiming it had only happened one time. . In his original version of what happened, he left out most of the truth. Elizabeth Edwards writes, “It turned out that a single time was not all it was.” If and when a cheating husband finally confesses to his wife, he’s likely to conceal many of the facts surrounding the affair. It’s not uncommon for a cheating spouse to continue to lie about the affair until presented with irrefutable proof.
Why do lie? Some cheaters lie in a misguided attempt to spare the betrayed spouse’s feelings. Others lie because they feel their spouses are too trusting or too naïve to ever find out the truth. Still other cheaters lie because they feel they are clever enough to continue the affair behind the betrayed spouses back. It does not bode well if the cheater continues to lie about certain aspects of the affair. A betrayed wife should have some method of confirming whether or nor what she has been told is really true. A reverse phone number search or reverse e-mail search, or a background check on the mistress can prove valuable in uncovering the real truth.
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June 20th, 2009Uncategorized
President Barack Obama's March 20 memo was quite clear on stimulus lobbying: every communication between a lobbyist and a government agency regarding the stimulus has to be documented, and those records have to be posted.
We know that, like any giant pot of government money, the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act attracted lobbyists' interest. Lobbyists have long been required to give Congress quarterly disclosure reports outlining their lobbying efforts.
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June 19th, 2009UncategorizedImmediately post disclosure or discovery, many mixed orientation couples go through what is called the "honeymoon phase". It's not a honeymoon that anyone should want! The initial pain of confrontation is past, and the straight spouse has some decisions to make about what the future holds.
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June 19th, 2009Uncategorized
Two powerful groups of moderate Democratic lawmakers have met with their House leaders to warn against pushing health care reform proposals too far to the left.
The New Democrat Coalition and the Blue Dogs met separately Thursday with Democratic leaders to push for legislation they could embrace.
"We made it pretty clear that there are 51 of us, and if they want our vote on health care reform, we're going to be pretty involved in writing the bill," said Rep.
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June 18th, 2009UncategorizedIf you are a mother, and your husband is cheating on you, you'll want to be aware that his infidelity can affect you --and by default - your children in 3 ways.
Your husband’s extramarital affair can take its toll on you psychologically, physically and financially. For details on how infidelity can affect you as a mother in each od these 3 ways, continue reading below.
Psychologically
If your husband is cheating on you, it can lead to psychological issues that can negatively impact the way you interact with your children. You may be so pre-occupied with your husband’s extramarital affair that you become short tempered or impatient with your children. You may be so emotionally distraught that you neglect them, or are unable to give them the care and attention they deserve. It’s difficult to focus on the needs of your children while you are trying to deal with the issues associated with your husband’s affair –who the other woman is, how long the affair has been going on, why he cheated, who else knows, searching for proof of his infidelity so you can confront him about the affair, determining whether it’s just a fling or if his cheating poses a serious threat to your marriage. The mental stress you’re under can undermine your ability to be a good mother.
Your husband’s infidelity can also cause your children to have psychological problems that you, as a mother, will have to cope with, since you’re their primary caregiver. In younger children these problems may manifest themselves as depression, anxiety, problems in school, anti-social behavior or eating disorders. In addition to the problems mentioned above, older children and teens may also experience rebelliousness, promiscuity, or drug and alcohol abuse, and anger management issues.
Physically
If your cheating husband engages in unprotected sex, his infidelity puts you at risk for HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s) such as herpes, syphilis, or gonorrhea. STDs can cause cervical and other cancers, chronic hepatitis, pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), and other complications. If your health deteriorates, how can you take care of your children? Who will care for them if you can’t?
If you’re expecting, many STDs can be life threatening, for you and your baby. Becoming infected with an STD while you’re pregnant, can endanger the health of your baby. Some of the harmful effects your baby can suffer include low birth weight, pneumonia, nerve damage, blindness, deafness, and meningitis, just to name a few. Your baby could even be stillborn.
Your cheating husband can expose you to other STDs such as chlamydia and gonorrhea, which have no blatantly obvious symptoms, but can still seriously affect your reproductive system. Left detected and untreated, you could develop pelvic inflamatory disease (PID) which often leads to infertility, thus eliminating your chance to have more children. Even if you’re able to conceive, PID can cause serious complications, such as an ectopic, or tubal pregnancy which can be potentially fatal to you and your unborn child.
As for other health matters, recent studies have shown that many infidelity victims experience post-traumatic stress symptoms (PTSD) similar to those experienced by combat veterans. The trauma of discovering your husband’s infidelity can cause you to experience panic attacks, crying spells, rapid heart beat, elevated blood pressure, difficulty breathing, shock symptoms, chest pains, heart palpitations, sleep disturbances, flashbacks, difficulty concentrating, hyper-vigilance and other physical and emotional effects on your health.
Financially
If your cheating husband's extramarital affair progresses to the point of separation or divorce, it could affect your ability as a mother to financially provide for your child – especially if your husband refuses to meet his financial obligations. Without your husband’s income, you may be forced to lower your standard of living.
If your husband refuses to meet his financial obligations regarding alimony or child support, you may not be able to support your children in the manner they are accustomed to living. . Consider the financial implications a divorce would have on your and your children's living arrangements, health care, education, transportation, and the like.
You could end up having to work if you’ve been a stay-at-home Mom. Or if you’re a working mother, you may have to take a second job to make ends meet. This can severely limit the time you spend with your children. An unexpected divorce or separation can put an unsuspecting wife and mother in a serious financial bind.
Why as a Mother, You Cannot Afford to Be the Last to Know
That’s why it’s so important for you to educate yourself about infidelity – especially if are a mother. Ignorance is not bliss when it comes to infidelity and extramarital affairs. If you have children, and your husband is cheating, you cannot afford to be the last to know.
Forewarned is forearmed. Make it your business to familiarize yourself with the early warning signs of infidelity, as well as the subtle signs of an impending or an ongoing affair. This way you can take positive action at the first sign of trouble. Your children’s future, and the future of your marriage could well depend on your ability to spot the telltale signs of infidelity in time.
For the sake of your children, you need to familiarize yourself with the both the obvious and the subtle signs of infidelity. That way, if your husband is cheating you can find out before it’s too late. You’ll be in a position to protect yourself legally, financially, sexually and emotionally. But knowing what to look for is the key.
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June 18th, 2009Uncategorized
This is a stunning report on Obama’s Housing Rescue plan released in March 2009. this is the program created to help up to 9 million homeowners refinance their mortgages. If you recall this was an EMERGENCY; we had to act immediately.
So of the 9 million in need how many have utilized the program?
Senior federal housing officials say that of 51 loans made under the program, 50 were made by Melville, N.Y.-based Lend America, and those 50 loans are being held up pending ongoing federal investigations.
Ok, so out of 9 million people only 51 people qualified and took advantage of the program! Out of the 51 loans, only one loan has actually completed. Way to research the problem and present a viable solution!
When this program was announced I was asking, “how can you possibly spend $57 billion on 9 million people. That comes out to $6.3 million per affected homeowner. No one in our free press asked this question?
The next appalling fact is that 98% of these loans are shrouded in scandal. How does this happen? All you have to do is refinance a loan. How can you possibly screw this up?
The 50 loans being examined by federal authorities are a just a small piece of the $500 million in FHA loans Lend America underwrote last quarter. The company also recently became one of a hundred firms allowed to bundle these 100% taxpayer-guaranteed loans into securities.
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June 17th, 2009Uncategorized
Want to Learn How To Get Even With a Cheating Husband ?
So now its payback time, so you can show him what it feels like to be dealt from the bottom of the deck, just the same way as he has been doing you. Only your not going to just do something that will piss him off. Oh no! Your going to find something that you can do that will ruin his life forever!
Your Not Alone In You Pain and Grief
Do these sound like some of the thoughts that have been rolling around in your head ever since you found out that your husband was finding joy in another’s arm? If they are, then you are not alone because countless millions of women around the globe share you pain and grief.
Turn About Is Fair Play
Believe it or Not it is not uncommon for a wife to get even with her cheating husband by sleeping with another man and then throwing it in his face. However; while on the surface this may seem like a fair payback, it inevitably leaves the wife feeling less about herself.
Throw His Ass Out Of The House!
The best “first” step that any wife should take to get even with a cheating husband is to kick him out of the house. While it may seem drastic at first, none the less it will give you a chance to see where he stands. If he doesn’t want to straighten up and come back then good riddance, because he would have only brought you more misery in the long run.
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June 17th, 2009UncategorizedSo, what's so special about these t-shirts? I mean, they are just those ordinary ones with sequins and some sparkle, right? Wrong. These are Swarovski crystals! This brand particularly specializes in designs made with Swarovski crystals. Crystal Nation has been worn by celebs like Madonna, Taylor Momsen and many more.
I also like their menswear, especially on shirts. I have picked my favourite ones.
Visit their website. -
June 16th, 2009Uncategorized
Lindsay Lohan and sister Ali. Don't they look refreshing? Check out that bitch look on Aliana's face. Nice.
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June 16th, 2009Uncategorized
Let’s face it. Keeping affairs discreet can be hard at the best of times. Finding an excuse to leave the house or the office to spend time with your lover can be difficult to create on the spot and not accidentally and suspiciously reuse it – alibis are hard to perfect without help. An affair is supposed to be under the radar, so you wouldn’t just tell your partner you’re going to meet up with your lover for coffee and a quickie before coming home – you would have an alibi.Nobody wants a suspicious partner while they’re having an affair as it causes unnecessary heartache, concern and mistrust. We have found the best available tool to make sure your alibis are airtight. It’s so comprehensive your jaw may even drop when you find out first hand the quality of it. The employees of Alibinetwork.com are here for the convenience of creating alibis that work for your individual affair situation.
Take for example, you want to go on a weekend getaway with your lover but you’re not sure how to set it up so your partner doesn’t find out. Alibinetwork.com can get someone to call your home, dissimulating your employer and tell your partner you’re needed for an out of town conference or a meeting at the office. They can set everything up for you so the person who conveniently calls is your gender (so there’s no concern about it being a lover), knows your company name and if you like, can ask for you by nickname. It’s completely customizable and makes everything much easier and far less complicated and stressful for you. Nobody wants to get caught cheating and the best way to prevent this from happening is thinking before you speak, and having the right alibi.
Alibinetwork.com has a broad range of services to help you maintain your privacy and keep your family and work associates from learning what you’re really doing. They help you with call redirection, pseudo phone numbers, having someone ring your home with a work request allowing you to leave and see your lover, they can sending you an invitation for a conference, email you pseudo travel documents, send you event tickets and more so your spouse doesn’t suspect a thing before you leave and when you return. Evidence is the name of the game when it comes to alibis: if you have it, you’re safe.
Virtual Hotel Reception and Room for Longer Absences
If you’re going on a holiday with your lover or just want to get away, there’s an elaborate virtual hotel reception Alibinetwork.com can set up for you. Just tell them the city the hotel’s in, and give them your name and phone number. They will give you a phone number for your spouse to call (pseudo hotel reception) and then redirect the call to your number (pseudo hotel room) and you choose if you want it to go to the custom “in room voice mail” or actually answer it. It’s all discreet, very professional and realistic. The last thing you want is your partner calling up a hotel you say you’re staying at, only to find you’re not actually staying there and may not even be in the same town. This could lead to either a lot of pissed off missed calls from them to your phone while you’re away or a tumultuous and angry environment when you return home. Better safe than sorry.Virtual Friend for Shorter Absences and Rescue Calls
If you’re going to be late home from work because of a special rendezvous with your lover or want to spend a Saturday with your lover, Alibinetwork.com has it covered! Let them set you up with a gender specific virtual friend (with voice mail and phone number in the area you want) that calls you to organise golfing, fishing or shopping ventures, giving you a chance to leave the house. The wife/husband can even call them back if they’re feeling unsure about the validity and you can rest assure they’ll either answer in character or divert to the setup voicemail.From friends to doctors, Alibinetwork.com can make phone calls to get you out of almost any situation. Having a doctor surgery call so you can leave work early to see your lover is quite common. You could even ask a friend you know you can trust to help you with similar things. Make sure it’s someone who doesn’t spend a lot of time around your spouse to ensure you don’t get caught when you say you’re with them and they’ve actually organised a get together with your partner while you’re away (this will not work for obvious reasons!).
It’s important to have all bases covered when you’re having an affair. Having an alibi is extremely important if you plan on keeping your marriage and keeping your lover in a balanced, satisfying situation. You need to ensure you have a valid alibi in your head (and hands if possible) to explain your whereabouts should the conversation come up before you walk in the door. Having someone there to cover your ass because you come home at midnight or call in a sick day at work to spend more time with your lover is vital to keep things calm for all parties. There is no reason for there to be problems at home from your affair if you have strong alibis to support you.
